Steve and I are heading to Africa for five weeks. I’ll be honest I’m nervous not about being in Africa but about leaving my kids behind. I don’t think they are nervous about their parents being far away for so long. Secretly I think they feel relieved that I can’t text as often now. But here’s the thing, mothering never stops. That’s why I didn’t want to be a mother. I knew it was 24/7 until you die. My heart and mind are continuously directed towards my kids. And yes, they are young adults who are capable and enabled. But the thing about mothering is their every hurt, insecurity, excitement, adventure and fears live with you. This is my first year as an “empty nester.” It hasn’t been a huge transition. I was never a helicopter mom. I always had plenty of things happening in my own world. And yet, here I am, realizing how absorbed my mind has been in my kids lives lately. I worry about their choices and or lack of. I fret over their relationships and or lack there of. And well, that’s probably not good because it means I’ve stopped entrusting them to God. Have you ever had that realization? Suddenly you become aware that you have taken your kids out of God’s care and entrusted them to yourself? How did you discover it? One thing I know is it’s not a good thing. So perhaps my going is God’s way of removing me so He can have space (that I’ve been crowding) to speak to them. So off we go.
We’ve landed in London at 8 AM London time, 3 AM Dallas time. Steve was gracious to give me his business class upgrade on the flight over to London. Man, let me say the new 777 ER is amazing. My seat laid flat and I slept like a baby. We have a 14 hour lay over in London until our flight departs for Entebbe Uganda. Of course that means lots of time to work and EAT. There’s a constant flow of food in the lounge…Steve is happy. Steve can eat no matter where he is or what time it is. My stomach doesn’t alway cooperate like his. Yogurt will have to do.
I guess I didn’t sleep as well as I thought. I’m out for another four hours.