Last night 40 plus people gathered to discuss homosexuality. When you attend a salon you receive a salon document with content on the issue being discussed. There’s articles, videos, Scripture, historical & cultural background etc. We provide this information so we can have an informed conversation. Too often we speak without really knowing what we speak of. We want men and women to learn to think critical of their spiritual life. What does the Scripture really say? How did we come to that interpretation? How did culture influence that?

For our salon on homosexuality the salon document presented both sides of the argument, for and against homosexuality. One could see how both sides argue Scripture in support of their positions. It’s important to know both sides believe Scripture supports their position. My desire is for us to learn how to discern a strong and/or weak argument. Both sides have them! It helps us decide what, if any, Scripture we really can stand on in defense of our position. But our salons aren’t only about understanding the Bible. They are designed to help us think theologically and engage practically. That’s where the human side comes in.

Last night we heard from a mother who’s daughter came out. A father who’s daughter came out. A cousin, aunt, a close friend. One woman shared her own homosexual journey. Those real life stories help us see the human side of this issue. Too often we evangelicals want to be “biblical” without allowing the Word to become flesh. Hearing their struggles reminded me this isn’t just theology, it’s personal. And people desperately want to know how to navigate this issue. People have painful struggles with reconciling their faith and their love ( for their child, husband, friend, sibling etc.) How do you do this? That seems to be the biggest question people want answered. Not… what does the Bible say? But, “how then shall we live?

I wonder has the Church failed at teaching us this? Oh, we’ve equipped you to know the passages, Romans 1, Leviticus 18 & 29 … we’ve taught you it’s “wrong.” But have we taught “how then shall we live?” Personally, I think the Church has done a terrible job answering that question. Shame on us.

I’m asking the question, “how now shall I live” more and more. I don’t have all the answers. I’m a seeker. But I do know hearing real people’s struggles helps me be less militant. Less dogmatic. It makes me kinder, softer. It makes me take note of my words, tone, body language.

And it leaves me desperately praying …

Lord, please help us. We stink at loving.